Discussing Breast Cancer

St. Therese of Lisieux was known as ‘the little flower’ in her day. This little poem made its way to my inbox today and I thought I’d say it now, with you in mind. God bless.

May today there be peace within.
May you trust God that you are exactly where you are meant to be.
May you not forget the infinite possibilities that are born of faith.
May you use those gifts that you have received, and pass on the love that has been given to you.
May you be confident knowing you are a child of God. Let this presence settle into your bones, and allow your soul the freedom to sing, dance, praise and love. It is there for each and every one of us.

Amen

I’ve been in Vermont for the past few days (my family took a ski vacation with another family — had an awesome trip); the entire time I was gone I went without cell service or an Internet connection. Holy cow, that’s life changing.

I can remember a time when those issues weren’t even on my peripheral. But now — geesh, did I feel disconnected from my life. I checked my iPhone as soon as we entered a cell service zone and there were hundreds of emails to sort through, several voice messages to play and a dozen or so numbers in the caller ID, people that didn’t leave messages. Welcome home, huh?

One of the emails I received had the above image in it — sent from a neighbor who recently discovered Mamasource, an online community of moms.

Mamasource is a place where you can log in to give/receive advice, referrals, support … prayers. If it’s like any other online communities, the outpouring of comfort and friendship for a woman with cancer is unsuprpassable. Also, women on forums like these almost always give/receive prayer support and research has shown that online prayer support makes a difference for cancer patients.

Coming home to this image in my inbox, well, it helped me reconnect to my neighboring community again. It made me feel cared for and uplifted and closer to humanity. It made me feel supported.

Looking at it makes me want to do that for someone else … wanna join me? Come on, it’s easy. Let’s send virtual well wishes — an email or an online card — to someone who desperately needs to stay connected.

Thought I’d share this video of my three-year old daughter putting on a puppet show for her daddy today:

Yikes … Christmas really is just three days away. Technically, my celebration begins in two days, when my in-laws show up at my door loaded down with presents for their grandchildren. Each year, within minutes of their arrival, my brother-in-law says it looks like Toys R Us has thrown up in my living room — graphic, I know, I’m sorry. But seriously — it is all about the gifts with them. My mother-in-law starts shopping the day after Christmas — and collects gifts all year as she finds them, often forgetting what she’s already purchased, anxiously awaiting the opening so she can remember items purchased months prior. And she shops every day, it’s what she does. It’s really quite unreal.

I’m just not that on the ball (well, I don’t have the means, either, but even if I did, I’m not sure I’d be that one the ball). Admittedly, my shopping is never done until the day before Christmas so this year? I’ve got two days to finish up. And very few things are wrapped … and I’m responsible for making Christmas Eve dinner for twelve. Yeah, panic is possible … but I won’t let it happen to me. Here’s what I’m going to do and what I suggest you do as well.

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My ten year wedding anniversary is today. Ten years ago my husband and I said our vows and pledged to be there for each other ‘in sickness and in health.’

Who would have imagined that ‘in sickness’ part would have turned out to be so much more than the flu.

My husband, God bless him, loves me so much. I think he fell in love with me at first sight. Here’s the story:

I was sitting at a table at the Black Duck Cafe in Westport, CT on a night they had karaoke — I loved going to karaoke. A young man came up to me and told me he had just paged a buddy of his so the pay phone next to my table was about to ring; then he asked me to get him from his table when it did. The phone rang. I answered then went to get the young man at his table. And sitting at that table was another young man, the man who is now my husband, and he caught my eye.

“You’re cute,” I said with a smile. “Young … but cute.” That started a courtship that I was reluctant to begin — to say the least. But he was persistent and I was swayed and somewhere along the way I became committed.

But I had him at “you’re cute.”

Several years (and quite a few ups and downs) later, we exchanged vows.

Today, my husband and I are celebrating the fact that we joined our lives in marriage ten years ago. Ten years, three kids, two bouts of cancer and one house later, we’re still committed. That is such a great, great feeling. For me, knowing my husband didn’t knowingly sign up for the role of caregiver but rose to that challenge so well means everything to me.

Thankfully, and by the grace of God, today is an ‘in health’ day and we are going to celebrate.

So I get this email from a friend today with the subject: The Game Is On! When I open the email it reads:

BE KIND. The Game is on!!! And you’re IT!

Describe ME in one word….just one single word. Send it to me and to me only. Next, send this message to all your friends and see how many strange and interesting things they say about you.

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Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

I’m not a huge tennis fan (I can count on one finger the number of matches I’ve actually watched). But when a colleague at the Breast Cancer Survival Center here in Fairfield County, CT asked me if I was interested in two comp tickets for survivors sponsored by Femara … I took her up on it because my mother was certain it would be a fantastically fun thing for she and I to do together.

So we went … two survivors, one breast, one ovarian … to the women’s final match at the Pilot Pen Tennis Tournament on Saturday. We were there to witness Svetlana Kuznetsova take the trophy after Agnes Szavay succumbed to her ailing back.

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No sooner did I try to reassure you all that I was back from vacation and getting in the saddle again — I drop off the face of the earth again.

I’m sorry.

Life … takes crazy turns. Been hectic. Mostly good. Some not so good. My health is fine though, rest assured.

Thanks for your patience (again).

I was on vacation last week with the family. I’ll post more later today but I wanted to let you know first thing this morning that I was back and haven’t forgotten you!

I’m so sorry I’ve been neglecting you all.

I’ve been a bit preoccupied with my missing cat.

She fled our house last weekend, after the trauma of being captured and confined on the way to/from the veterinarian for a routine visit. She’s left behind her biological sister, our family of five, and the hyperactive puppy that joined our home in January. (I suppose I can’t blame her, the dog incessantly mounted the poor cat to display her dominance over her feline cohabitant and often nibbled on her ear as a sort of foreplay to the mounting — did I mention they were both female??? Crazy animal behavior. Apparently the cat had enough!)

I’m finding it hard to do anything productive. My mind can’t focus on anything other than the sliding glass door where she should be showing up any minute now. My heart is just broken.

I apologize for being melodramatic about a cat when I’m here to talk about breast cancer.

I miss my cat.

I hope everyone has a grand Fourth of July! As we celebrate the birth of the United States and the signing the Declaration of Independence, I wish you all a safe and happy holiday.

Take a minute to reflect — that flag of ours is really special, isn’t it?

Enjoy the fireworks tonight, wherever you are. Think of the bombs bursting in air giving proof through the night that our flag was still there.

Test how much you know about all things patriotic, check out this quiz at whitehousekids.com and tell me … are you smarter than a fifth grader?

Seriously though: Happy Fourth of July everybody. Happy Fourth of July!

I can’t resist. I know this isn’t a tech blog, but the iPhone my husband bought me is so cool I can’t resist.

I did figure out a way to tie it into the cause: My husband purchased a Case Mate iPhone Signature Leather Case in black. I couldn’t help but check to see if they had one in pink (they do).

But I’m going to hold out on buying a pink case until someone creates an iPhone case for the cause. Anyone got connections?

I’ve been tagged to participate in a meme … to share seven random facts about myself with all of you. Since we are discussing breast cancer here, they’ll be randomly related to breast cancer as well:

1. We adopted our third child after my first treatment for breast cancer. My oncologist told me that she wouldn’t prescribe Tamoxifen for me if we wanted more biological children b/c it could cause fetal harm if we were to conceive. But my husband and I were already sure in our hearts that if our family were to grow at that point in time it would be through the miracle of adoption.
2. I was on birth control pills for a long time. I often wondered if they didn’t have something to do with my cancer. Particularly because I had switched to the patch the month before my first mammogram; you should have seen how quickly I ripped that cancer feeding square off my body when I was diagnosed and how messed up I was when I found out my cancer was estrogen receptive! (FYI, the research says, no, that wasn’t what caused my cancer.)
3. I’m Catholic … and felt so blessed to go into my double mastectomy because I knew that at the moment I was being cut opened, a large group of women were gathered at my church, hosting a rosary service for me. Talk about a powerful prayer experience — and I wasn’t even there.
4. I sent 71 thank you notes out after my recovery last summer … to the people that cooked for, cared for, and shopped for my family. 71. Can you stand it? I didn’t know that I knew 71 people in this community!
5. I’m a Saturday night. See, I’m a HUGE Bon Jovi fan. Bon Jovi songs got me through my daily trips to Yale for treatment in 2003. I can still hear his voice urging me on as I drove … “hey, man, I’m alive, I’m taking each day and night at a time. I’m feeling like a Monday but someday I’ll be a Saturday night!”
6. I’m a writer but I wasn’t going to write about my illness (too emotionally painful to even write about) until a friend of mine gave me a beautiful journal — like a travel journal. A travel journal. For my journey. How smart was that of him? Talk about an intervention!
7. Last but not least … and of course the most personal, reserved only for those that are still reading … I have no nipples (and no intention of getting nipples in the near future). At this point in time, my children have missed me through too many surgeries and I won’t leave them for a single elective surgery at this point.

Those are my facts … what are yours?

The rules:
If you are tagged, you need to start by posting 7 random facts about yourself on your blog. Then list these rules and tag 7 others people (figuratively, obviously). List their names on your blog with a link to get your readers there. Then comment for each of the tagged, letting them know they have been tagged. Get i

I tag these survivors:

Jayne
Courtney
Jacki
Jeannette
Angi
Marjory
Janelle