Discussing Breast Cancer

When Tim and I went to Fairfield University’s Relay for Life event we bid on a few silent auction items. Turns out I won one of them: a great Fairfield University sweatshirt!

There are three reasons this is so exciting to me: (1) I won something (2) I graduated from Fairfield U and (3) I love comfy clothes.

Time to write another check to the American Cancer Society!

Did I ever post about the skeptic who wondered what I did with my earnings from this board? HA! It’s almost a joke when I think about her skepticism. I give, and give, and give. Let me tell you, Tim and I are not living the high life here, we barely make ends meet most months. What I earn is a dime in comparison to the dollars we contribute to the cause.

I’m not discussing breast cancer for the income. I’m discussing breast cancer for the same reason you are reading this post right now. I care deeply about this cause.

Now, it’s time to turn the air conditioner up so I can wear my new sweatshirt!

Once again, my husband proved to me he shares my passion for breast cancer related products. He came home from work last night and placed a package of these pink Paper Mate pens on my desk.

So I googled, ‘Write for Hope’ and found this site … what a beautiful looking web page. Make a donation and you can write a note for hope yourself.

Of course, the Pink Ribbon Shop has these and a whole line of office supplies.

Have fun!

Here’s a new event for ya’ll!

The Young Survival Coalition is sponsoring a ‘Stand Up For Survival’ virtual walk to raise money for programs and services dedicated to young women affected by breast cancer.

I can attest … young women can and do get breast cancer.

You can participate virtually or take an actual walk through your own community; you set the day, the time and the route.

I’ve set up a home page for the Discussing Breast Cancer team here.

Join me?

I never get tired of products that donate to the cause (and my husband knows it, God bless him).

How about these cute totes and laptop cases?

I want one! I don’t really carry my laptop these days but I would if I had a bag this cute. Love it. Thanks for sharing this with me, Tim, so I could share it with my readers.

The last thing I shared about my personal experience was that time period immediately post-op: the pain, the immobility and the fear that I’d never recover.

The hospital staff (doctors, nurses, all of them) consistently told me the first 24 hours were the worst and each day would be better than the next. I was anxiously awaiting the time when I’d notice things were improving. Instead, I felt worse, because I started to feel feverish. You know how you can tell when your temperature isn’t normal? I couldn’t move but I certainly could distinguish between malaise and discomfort and fever and illness.

So when a nurse came in to take my vitals, I told her I was sure I had a fever, and I was right. 102 degrees. So then not only did my body hurt like hell but my head and my eyes hurt like hell as well.

I was still a bit loopy from all the morphine but unsure how to better manage the pain I was in. Someone from ‘pain management’ asked me what my pain goal was on a scale of 1-10 and I couldn’t believe the question. Hello? ZERO please! I was still in the double digits on that one and the pain was just compounded by the fever I’d developed.

It was worse than being between a rock and a hard place. It was like being between a rock and a hard place and the two sides started to push in one you so you can’t get out.

And of course, I just wanted to see my kids … and I knew I couldn’t because I didn’t want them to see me like that. I missed them some thing fierce. But to take away their fear, I had to be in decent shape when they came to see me, and that wouldn’t be for days.

Over the course of that first weekend, my mother and father visited me, my mother and father in law visited me, my two sisters visited me, and of course my husband was with me almost continuously. (One of these days I’ll share his point of view about the entire experience.) But I wanted no other visitors — so much for the plans my friends had to come and cheer me up.

Gradually the pain did diminish — I switched from morphine to codeine to Percocet to Tylenol.

Gradually the fever did go down — honestly, I don’t remember what caused secondary infection caused that one.

So plans were made for my kids to come and visit.

These are still going on … wouldn’t you like to see this blog win for Best Health Blog? It just takes voters … thanks guys.

Remember the relief and the joy you felt as a kid on that last day of school? I do. The streamers out the bus window. The songs banishing teachers dirty looks. Mom waiting for you at home, smile on her face, arms outstretched, joy in her own heart, too.

That’s the mom I am today. While some moms are stressed because summer camp can’t start soon enough and others are saddened by the quick passing of time in their children’s lives, I am one happy momma.

Because I’m here for another summer. I’m able to take my kids to the beach, the zoo and the aquarium. I’m able to move my body well this summer (couldn’t say that last June). I’m so blessed.

So many people think survivors no longer ’sweat the small stuff’ — but that’s not necessarily true. Believe me, I still freak out over little things and have to remind myself they are indeed little things. That’s simply human nature.

What survivors do that is different is soak up the small stuff — the good small stuff that others brush off so quickly. I stayed in the freezing cold waters of Long Island Sound yesterday for an insanely long time so I didn’t have to stop swirling my five year old around. His little hands in mine warmed my heart and that just felt so good. I spoon fed my three year old daughter her dinner last night even though she’s been capable of feeding herself for at least a year just because I love the way she uttered ‘ummmmmmm’ after every bite and I couldn’t hear that enough. Then I sat on my bed this morning and watched my seven year old play his hand held video game on my bed because the rising sun made the highlights in his light brown hair sparkle.

Just feeling my kids. Seeing them. Hearing them. That’s such a gift.

Forget about not sweating the small stuff.

Soak up the small stuff.

Toya, at The Life of a Ladybug! Her comment was randomly selected to receive a copy of the book. I’m so psyched for her.

Toya participated in The Beauty Network’s original Comment for a Cure event and gave $100 to theSisters Network, a national African-American Breast Cancer Survivorship Organization. LOVE IT!

Thank you so much, Toya … your support of survivors is outstanding. I appreciate your visit to Discussing Breast Cancer and commenting over here for the cause as well.

The National Cancer Institute decided not to proceed with research into drugs that could prevent breast cancer. The benefits of the research for women at high risk of the disease were outweighed by the potential and uncertain dangers. Too many unknowns at this point to move forward. (Read the story in the Washington Post here.)

I wasn’t at high risk before I was diagnosed (heck, I was barely at risk at all). Would I have taken a preventative drug? No way, no how. But if I were at high risk … well, I’d most likely have wanted to do everything and anything to prevent even one little cancer cell from growing in my body.

Many women at high risk of breast cancer get voluntary mastectomies … can you really blame them?

I think it was a mistake to cancel the effort. I mean, how many mistakes resulted in wondrous medicines and cures? Seriously! Can you spell PENICILLIN?

Maybe in their work to research preventative medicines they’d have come across a cure.

I’ve been tagged to participate in a meme … to share seven random facts about myself with all of you. Since we are discussing breast cancer here, they’ll be randomly related to breast cancer as well:

1. We adopted our third child after my first treatment for breast cancer. My oncologist told me that she wouldn’t prescribe Tamoxifen for me if we wanted more biological children b/c it could cause fetal harm if we were to conceive. But my husband and I were already sure in our hearts that if our family were to grow at that point in time it would be through the miracle of adoption.
2. I was on birth control pills for a long time. I often wondered if they didn’t have something to do with my cancer. Particularly because I had switched to the patch the month before my first mammogram; you should have seen how quickly I ripped that cancer feeding square off my body when I was diagnosed and how messed up I was when I found out my cancer was estrogen receptive! (FYI, the research says, no, that wasn’t what caused my cancer.)
3. I’m Catholic … and felt so blessed to go into my double mastectomy because I knew that at the moment I was being cut opened, a large group of women were gathered at my church, hosting a rosary service for me. Talk about a powerful prayer experience — and I wasn’t even there.
4. I sent 71 thank you notes out after my recovery last summer … to the people that cooked for, cared for, and shopped for my family. 71. Can you stand it? I didn’t know that I knew 71 people in this community!
5. I’m a Saturday night. See, I’m a HUGE Bon Jovi fan. Bon Jovi songs got me through my daily trips to Yale for treatment in 2003. I can still hear his voice urging me on as I drove … “hey, man, I’m alive, I’m taking each day and night at a time. I’m feeling like a Monday but someday I’ll be a Saturday night!”
6. I’m a writer but I wasn’t going to write about my illness (too emotionally painful to even write about) until a friend of mine gave me a beautiful journal — like a travel journal. A travel journal. For my journey. How smart was that of him? Talk about an intervention!
7. Last but not least … and of course the most personal, reserved only for those that are still reading … I have no nipples (and no intention of getting nipples in the near future). At this point in time, my children have missed me through too many surgeries and I won’t leave them for a single elective surgery at this point.

Those are my facts … what are yours?

The rules:
If you are tagged, you need to start by posting 7 random facts about yourself on your blog. Then list these rules and tag 7 others people (figuratively, obviously). List their names on your blog with a link to get your readers there. Then comment for each of the tagged, letting them know they have been tagged. Get i

I tag these survivors:

Jayne
Courtney
Jacki
Jeannette
Angi
Marjory
Janelle

I added up the dollar amount for my ‘comments for the cure’ contest (the idea I borrowed from The Beauty Blog Network). Over the course of two days, this blog saw 23 comments. That means I owe the American Cancer Society $23.

And … Elke, Catslyn, Mark Jabo and Tim Lynch (my dear husband) all said they’d match whatever dollar amount we came up with.

You guys can donate online here.

Can you believe it? This blog, in two days, raised $115 for the ACS. Great job, everyone. It is such a symbolic gesture for survivors everywhere. Thank you.

Seriously … thank you … from the bottom of my heart.

This morning, I checked my email, and there was the most beautiful work of art inside. A gift for a survivor. A gift for me.

The email was from Mig, a woman I don’t know, a woman with an artistic talent beyond words, and it’s not even her source of income from what I can tell.

Her website for Online Public Relations speaks of her other talents.

A few days ago she posted about her collages that ‘unleash your dreams’ — I love that she unleashed my dream for this banner, my dream for this site, my dream for survivors everywhere.

She saw into my heart and created something that takes my breathe away.

More on Mig to come … but i couldn’t wait another minute to share my gift with you.

451 Press is allowing their bloggers to create their own masthead for their site. A logo of sorts. Some of the 451 Bloggers (the real creative ones) already have great mastheads up and running. Check out ToyBender, PopBuzzUK, WatchingtheView, Earthly Garden … you’ll see what I mean. Compare those mastheads to this one and the difference is clear.

Problem is … I’m not artistically capable. Are you? If yes, and if you feel so inclined, submit your work to me. You’ll get full credit for it here on Discussing Breast Cancer. I’ll mention anyone who submits a banner in a post with a link to their site. Sound good? Will it take more to get you to call on your muse?

FYI, the masthead will be 728 pixels by 90 pixels, so the logo must fit inside those parameters.

Thanks guys!

Last week I posted about the Beauty Blog Network’s Comments for a Cure … where participating bloggers donated $1 per comment made from June 4th - 6th to the cancer charity of their choice.

I thought I’d revisit the posts on this site during that time period to see how many comments I received. Three. That would make my donation three bucks … were I officially participating.

So, I’m giving you an official chance to make a difference. I know I have a lot of lurkers b/c I’ve seen the stats (we’re talking hundreds of people each day).

I’m having my own ‘comments for the cure’ competition. I’m going to donate $1 per comment today and tomorrow (that’s Thursday, June 14th and Friday, June 15th) to the American Cancer Society. I’ll add those previously mentioned $3 to the top of whatever the grand total is (let’s make that $3 look ridiculous).

And, I’ll mail a copy of our next book club selection “Cancer Vixen” to a randomly selected commenter.

Come out, come out, wherever you are …

Of course, only five people voted … and one of them was me … but a vote is a vote and I have to call it done so we have time to read.

Cancer Vixen by Marisa Acocella Marchetto is a graphic memoir. Love that concept!

Apparently it “is as bold, vibrant, and brave as she is–pumped full of color, the story leaps off the page and into your heart. Poignant and funny, this inspiring story is made all the more powerful by Marchetto’s cartoons.”

Seems like a great beach read. I’m totally psyched and will head down to Borders tomorrow. If you want to buy it online, I’ve included the Amazon link below.

So … planning ahead for next month … what titles do you want me to include on the list for July’s book club selection?